As the end of the year approaches, what you should be thinking about in your family law life?
Holidays are times to be savored and enjoyed. So, make your plans now, make sure they are agreed upon, and relax. When you reached an agreement with your former spouse, hopefully, you were specific about when a holiday begins and ends. For instance, does Christmas begin on December 24 or on December 25? Does it start at 5 pm and end at noon, or something different. The goal of these agreements is to have a place to look to for an answer in the event of a disagreement. If your agreement is not that specific, approach the subject now. It may be uncomfortable, but better to know in advance so that each of you can plan your time with the children and family.
It also tends to be a time of resolutions. What should you resolve to do? Make sure your estate documents are in order. Following a divorce, or even in the midst of a divorce, it is appropriate to review your documents, to be sure they will operate to carry out your wishes.
Are you tired of fighting? Then resolve to insulate yourself from things that lead to the fights. Boundaries can be helpful in determining what you will allow to get under your skin. If someone calls you incessantly, it’s ok to let messages go to voicemail for instance, and deal with them the next morning when you might be better equipped.
Resolve to take the high road. It is easy to get drawn into the negativity that often surrounds divorce. But, it can take a lot of precious energy to engage. Decide not to engage in the negative and turn it to positive. Eventually, the other person will usually recognize that pushing your buttons do not work anymore, and will move on.
Finally, recognize that your children know exactly what is going on. They know who they can rely on and trust, who badmouths the other, and who is behaving in the better way. Behave in a manner that benefits the long term, not the short term.
ABOUT LINDA SORG OSTOVITZ
Linda Sorg Ostovitz is a family law attorney. Her legal experience spans more than 34 years. In this time, she has served as a leader, educator and advocate. Mrs. Ostovitz holds a prestigious fellowship in the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Currently, she serves as President for the Business Women’s Network of Howard County, by which she was chosen Woman of Distinction for 2014. Mrs. Ostovitz represents clients in Howard, Anne Arundel, Carroll and Baltimore Counties. Her practice focuses exclusively on divorce litigation and mediation, child custody and access, child support, alimony, business valuation, as well as property and asset distribution. In addition to providing legal representation in court, Mrs. Ostovitz provides mediation services to help families come to a fair and legally-sound conclusion outside of the traditional court proceedings.
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