Managing the divorce process can be difficult. Uncertainty permeates the process. But once decisions are made, either by way of an agreement or by way of judicial decision, it is time to pick up the pieces and move on. Even if you do not favor the decision to terminate your marriage, acceptance is the first step toward moving forward.
Try something new. Have you always wanted to try something, but your spouse was unsupportive or uninterested? Since you no longer need your spouse's approval for things you do in your spare time, you can concentrate on checking-off some of the items on your bucket list.
Focus on your career. Since you are no longer focusing on your marriage, you may have more energy to devote to your job or volunteer work and activities. Work toward earning a promotion or go back to school to start a new career.
Focus on your children. If you have children, then they need to be your priority. Continue to nurture your relationship, regardless of the custody arrangement. Stick to the visitation agreement and work hard to get along with your ex for the sake of your children.
Start exercising. Studies show that exercise is a great stress reliever. Being active, especially when you're doing something that you enjoy, releases endorphins and offers a welcomed distraction.
Find someone to talk to. Sharing your feelings can be a constructive way of avoiding the emotional toll of keeping your feelings bottled-up inside. Talking to a trusted confidant can provide much-needed support and a little objectivity. If you prefer to talk to acquaintances, consider joining a support group. Just be sure the meetings don't turn into gripe-sessions where people consistently complain about their ex-spouses. Try to surround yourself with people who have survived divorce and successfully moved on.
Write it down. It is sometimes better to express your feelings in writing instead of verbally. Journaling is an excellent way to get your feelings out by putting them down on paper. It is also private enough that you won't be tempted to use your words to hurt your ex-spouse. Some people find that "writing" a letter to their ex, and then destroying it, can be cathartic. Doing so can leave you feeling that you've said all you need to say.
Let go of regret. Your marriage is over and a thing of the past. Second guessing what went wrong is often an exercise in futility. Constantly regretting things you should have done will only keep you in the past. Use this time to let go of regret and look forward to new things to come.
In addition to trying some of these tips above, you may need to seek help from a medical or mental health professional, a financial advisor, or someone to provide more education about your process. Divorce is not the end of your life, it is the beginning of a new chapter, but moving on may take some work. Eventually, you will start to feel better once the divorce process is over.
If you are ready to move from marriage to divorce and need legal assistance, then please contact Linda Sorg Ostovitz at email@example.com or 301-575-0381.
ABOUT LINDA SORG OSTOVITZ
Linda Sorg Ostovitz is a family law attorney. Her legal experience spans more than 34 years. In this time, she has served as a leader, educator and advocate. Mrs. Ostovitz holds a prestigious fellowship in the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Currently, she serves as President for the Business Women’s Network of Howard County, by which she was chosen Woman of Distinction for 2014. Mrs. Ostovitz represents clients in Howard, Anne Arundel, Carroll and Baltimore Counties. Her practice focuses exclusively on divorce litigation and mediation, child custody and access, child support, alimony, business valuation, as well as property and asset distribution. In addition to providing legal representation in court, Mrs. Ostovitz provides mediation services to help families come to a fair and legally-sound conclusion outside of the traditional court proceedings.
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