Legal Blog

Focus on the Children When Co-Parenting: Keeping Balance and Managing Frustration

co-parentingCo-parenting after a divorce can be a very complex matter, especially if contention exists between the parents. Much of what a child will experience depends upon the interactions between the parents and how they treat one another. Here are some important tenets of co-parenting.

Focus on the psychological well-being of the child. It is always best to think of the child before acting with animosity toward your former husband or wife. Making negative comments to your child, about the other parent, can create longstanding psychological issues and puts the child in the middle. Whenever disagreements arise, they should be expressed privately, in the presence of a mediator, if necessary, who can then work to resolve the issue without involving the child.

Never vent to your child. Finding a support group, talking to a friend or consulting a trained professional can provide a much-needed release of any residual feelings surrounding your divorce with your former spouse. Doing so can keep your frustrations in check and keep you from being tempted to share your thoughts with your child, who is already dealing with his/her own feelings. Remember, if you speak badly about your ex, you are also saying negative things about your child’s parent. Whether intended or not, this behavior can leave your child feeling sad, upset, and caught in the middle.

Be cordial during visits. To effectuate access, you may be required to drop-off your child at a former spouse’s home. In addition to adhering to the written agreement, establishing a business-like, but courteous demeanor during the exchange will allow your child to focus on the quality time to be spent with the parent. If necessary, limit interaction with your ex during the drop-off to avoid arguments.

Many of the above situations require a mediator or divorce attorney you can trust.  Linda Sorg Ostovitz is prepared to help you through the complicated maze of divorce and co-parenting. Contact me so we can help move you toward a more positive outcome at or telephone (301) 575-0381.


Linda OstovitzLinda Sorg Ostovitz is a family law attorney. Her legal experience spans more than 34 years. In this time, she has served as a leader, educator and advocate. Mrs. Ostovitz holds a prestigious fellowship in the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. Currently, she serves as President for the Business Women’s Network of Howard County, by which she was chosen Woman of Distinction for 2014. Mrs. Ostovitz represents clients in Howard, Anne Arundel, Carroll and Baltimore Counties. Her practice focuses exclusively on divorce litigation and mediation, child custody and access, child support, alimony, business valuation, as well as property and asset distribution. In addition to providing legal representation in court, Mrs. Ostovitz provides mediation services to help families come to a fair and legally-sound conclusion outside of the traditional court proceedings.


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